Paperback Heroes

Like thousands of women, I'm a sucker for trashy love stories, particularly historical romances set in the Regency and Victorian eras. The funny thing is, I never paid these types of novels much attention until my sister shoved one of her books to me.

(Hui Yin has always been the reader in the family. She never leaves home without a book or two. And sometimes, she reads two books simultaneously!

And she is nuts about historical romances.)

Sure, I spent a fair amount of time reading Mills & Boon stuff during my teens. But I outgrew those (she is still at it, though) and went on to more "serious" and "intelligent" stuff - non-fictions like biographies, real-life crime stories as well as murder mysteries and sci-fi fantasies. And I absolutely had no interest in reading any historical romance novels, until about 2 years ago.

And I've been hooked since. Most of the stories are silly to begin with - titled, dashing and wickedly handsome aristocrats who would move mountains and swim the seven seas to be with their lovely (and often in distress) damsels. There would be conflicts, scandals and even tragedies before they could find true love with each other. And of course, the besotted lovers would live happily ever after.

Predictable? Absolutely. Waste of time? Not entirely.

You see, the words are usually written so beautifully. Even when the characters quarrel, they do so with so much finesse and grace. Check this out:

"If your carriage had been moving at any speed above an almost imperceptible crawl, madam, it would not have posed a reckless endangerment to serious, responsible travellers who would really prefer to get somewhere by the end of a day instead of spending eternity on one stretch of road." - Lucius Marshall, Viscount Sinclair in Simply Unforgettable

Or this:

"A woman can use charms and looks for three things. She can go into the theatre, she can become a man's mistress or she can marry. As for me, I have no inclination or talent for acting and no wish to shame my family by entering into an illicit relationship. My only choice is marriage. That, I suppose, is what it means for a woman to be a survivor." - Elizabeth Hotchkiss in How To Marry A Marquis

Classy, no? I absolutely adore this kind of language (of course the book titles are often really no brainers). Which explains why I'm so besotted with Hugh Jackman's Leopold in Kate & Leopold! Leopold talks like that - and he's tall, dark and handsome! Ha ha.

Well, there's nothing wrong with indulging in a little fantasy, as silly as it sounds. After all, grown men the world over are obsessed with their comics. At least I don't need to look at pages of drawings to read my books. That's for kids, isn't it?

Fish Out Of Water

My sister Hui Yin started her new job at Hong Leong Bank yesterday. It is only her second job after being in the workforce for about 10 years. I say good for her.

I read her email just now. As expected, she is a bit depressed now, having had to adjust to a new workplace, new bosses, new colleagues, new everything, etc. She even described her current state of being like a fish out of water.

Well, fish, listen up. Leaving a dead-end job, or rather a job that's no longer rewarding, is the best thing you can do for yourself. Whether you've made the right choice still remains to be seen, of course. But at least you've taken that leap. If anything, it may be the right stepping stone to move elsewhere eventually. After this first leap, you'll find it easier to leap again if the need arises. Trust me. I know.

I remember my last permanent job. The pay was much better than my job before that but more was also expected of me. And I had this real "terror" title on my business card too - Senior Consultant, Content Development. Gosh, I nearly fainted when I saw that. I was merely a low profile content writer and my new employers upgraded me a few times! Perpetually worried that I couldn't live up to expectations, I hardly ever handed out my business card, even when I was supposed!

Honestly, I didn't think I could last very long there. Everything was so high tech and I was pretty intimated by the demanding clients we served. But you know what, eventually, it turned out to be the job that I stayed on the longest - 5 years - in all my years in the workforce back in KL. Things got easier as time went by, of course.

So fish, if you're reading this, know that it's normal to be depressed now. But a smart cookie like you should have no trouble getting the hang of things at the new office. Good luck! Break both legs!

Anyone Missing Daddy?

Alex is away on a business trip in China. He's been there for a few days. And each day, I would ask the kids if they missed their daddy. The answer was invariably a "No", expressed in an I-couldn't-care-less manner.

But this morning, I got a different reply from Joanne. She actually said "Yes". Ah finally, I thought, redemption for the man of the house. At least one of his kids finally started to miss him. When I asked my 4-year-old why, she replied: "I want Daddy to come home because we don't have much money left. We need him to give us money to buy things."

Some redemption. (I have been stressing the need to be thrifty since we are now a single income family and it appears that Joanne actually understands that more than I give her credit for.)

So Daddy is only useful because without him, we have no money. It's awful to hear my own child sounding so mercenary!

Well, that the price for not being a hands-on dad during the first 12 months of the kids' lives. Unlike many modern dads I know, Alex seemed to be stuck in the 1950s, happy to leave everything concerning the kids to me (and his parents while we were in Malaysia). It used to irk me endlessly. Then I gave up on nagging him. He would eventually regret that.

And I was right. These days, Alex does try to make up what he missed before with the kids. Unfortunately, he doesn't know how to handle them. He'll be completely lost if I were to leave the kids with him for more than 2 hours. Yes, it's that bad.

The kids will always prefer me to him, no matter what. So you blokes out there, if you're about to be a dad, make sure you play your parenting role effectively when the time comes. It's kind of sad if your kids don't miss you when you're away!

The Namewee Affair

Well, this young punk sure has got guts. I'm talking about Namewee, the Taiwan-based Malaysian who has caused more than just lots of red faces and is now facing stern legal actions for supposedly insulting the Malaysian national anthem.

His adapted version of the Negaraku (or rather Negarakuku!) was posted on YouTube and has been going around the cyberspace, much to the fury of the Malaysian government and its staunch supporters.

I've seen the video clip and I must say, the "song" is all so true, yet crude and hilarious at the same time. I saw the original version in Chinese and Bahasa. And if you read Chinese, it will have you in stitches in no time!

Few people have the guts to do what Namewee did, me included. One wonders whether he did it on impulse or had given it a lot of thoughts prior. We whinge about the unfairness we experience with increasing regularity but that's what most of us do. We just whinge among ourselves.

Not Namewee. This bloke actually verbalises, loud and clear, what we, particularly non-Bumi Malaysians, always bitch about. But what he conveys is all true - the injustice, the corruption, the horrendous civil service, the favouritism, etc. And he does so in a crude, yet equally creative and catchy manner.

Namewee is now a condemned man in Malaysia. See the unfairness in speaking the truth? Well, that's Malaysia for you. There is no such thing as freedom of speech there. It's just a myth.

Now, That's Magic

I finally watched The Prestige. Bought the DVD on sale. And it's really worth it. To sum it up, it is brilliant.

Of course, me being an idiot, I had to spoil my fun at least 10-fold by reading the plot and story before watching the movie first. Yeah, stupid me. For some reason, I'm always partial to spoilers. I couldn't wait for the real thing, so I looked for an alternative. You can find almost anything on the Internet these days.

The turns and twists of the story are amazing. Hats off to the author of the original novel, Christopher Priest, as well as Christopher and Jonathan Nolan who expertly adapted the novel for the big screen. It's astounding how creative and imaginative some people can be. Makes me feel extremely inadequate sometimes.

The casting, directing and acting were superb. It is a star-studded cast, with my favourites Hugh Jackman and Christian Bale playing the lead roles of Robert Angier and Alfred Borden respectively. Yeah, Wolverine and Batman are both in the movie!

Well, actually, they played more than one role each. Jackman is dashing and charismatic as the showman magician. He is also quite effective playing a perpetually imbibed actor hired to be his double in his act. Bale's performance too is unblemished. He is unrecognisable in his other role as Fallon, Borden's loyal illusion engineer. And David Bowie - well, I wouldn't know Tesla is Bowie if I hadn't seen the credits!

It was a thrill watching the 2 leads trying to outdo and sabotage each other (I was so mesmerised I didn't touch my favourite potato chips, not even once, and that says a lot!). But what heavy prices they had to pay!

Now I can't wait to get my hands on the novel. Meantime, I will just watch the movie a few more times. Of course, the extras on the DVD will certainly be a bonus for me.

Andrew's Baptism

Today, my nephew Andrew was baptised and welcomed to the Catholic Church. And I have the privilege of being his Godmother. I know, spiritually, I probably don't really qualify but I've been given the job, so I'll do my best as his companion and guide in his spiritual journey.

Anyway, the ceremony was simple yet beautiful. It was held at St Bedes Catholic Church in Balwyn North. St Bedes is also a Catholic school that Andrew is attending. Often, baptisms involved young infants. But in Andrew's case, he has made a conscious and clear decision to become a Catholic. Well, he may only be 9 but he's certainly given a lot of thoughts to that.

The ceremony was also unique in that the parish priest, the very affable and jovial Father Gregory Bennet, took the trouble to explain the important parts of the ceremony. I was baptised as a baby. So I had no recollection of what happened. The highlight was of course seeing Andrew had his head dunked in water. Joanne got really amused at that point!

And one more thing, the ceremony was actually held during the students' recess time this morning. That's right, a baptism during school hours.

Now, that was something I don't think I'll get to witness in Malaysia.

The Ugly Asian Driver

I hate to say this, but on the rare occasions that I witness someone behaving rudely, the culprit is almost always Asian. I've seen Asian shoppers shouting at each other and Asian drivers fighting over a parking spot. And today, I saw an irate and impatient Asian driver blasting his car horn continuously at the car in front of him.

Well, there was a slight congestion on the road we were travelling on before he lost his cool. But it wasn't long, not even 5 minutes. If you've endured KL traffic during peak hours, this is really nothing. Anyway, this guy was right in front of me and obviously the kiasu type. And he kept honking (I actually hadn't heard that kind of honking since I left KL). Most annoying.

The driver of the white car in front of him had signalled to indicate he wanted to do a reverse side parking. By right, this idiot should've waited and let the guy in front reverse. But no. He had to show his impatience and tried to honk the guy in front of him off the road.

The other guy opened his car door and got out. Great, I thought. There was going to be a showdown, right in the middle of the road! And dear God, this guy turned out to be a burly-looking redhead wearing a dark blue jacket. He had that mean look. Clearly pissed off, he approached the rude Asian driver. Then to my surprise, I saw him whipping out his wallet and flashing a badge.

The mean-looking redhead was a cop! Ha ha ha. Oh dear. The road bully wannabe picked the wrong guy to boss around! I couldn't hear what the cop said but he obviously gave the idiot in front of him a lot to worry about. Served him right for being so darn rude! I was hoping the cop would give him a summons or something like that but I think he let him off with only a warning.

I laughed all the way home. I've read about policemen in unmarked cars. Yep, don't fool around when driving here. Of course, the kiasuism in some Asians is just too hard to curb.

Swimming

Most kids would jump with joy at the thought of going to the swimming pool. Well, not Joshua. He is just weird.

You see, the school has a swimming programme for all the Prepies before this term ends. They are to attend swimming lessons stretched over 9 days at the end of the term. And it's only 45 minutes each session.

But our friend was (and probably still is) horrified by the prospect of going to the pool. It's not that he had had some traumatic near-drowning experience before. He's just too scared to swallow water and have water in his eye, ear and nose. Sissy. Too over-protected when he was back in KL under the care of his grandparents.

Well, he's going, whether he likes it or not. He actually burst into tears earlier because I insisted that he go. I tried convincing him that it would be fun and that he would regret it if he decided to give it a miss. I told him that he should be so lucky. Most kids in Malaysia won't have such an opportunity. I certainly didn't when I was schooling in Malaysia.

We'll see how it goes. He'll probably have so much fun that he forgets to be worried. Which is actually nothing to worry about in the first place! Sigh ...

Parking Blunder

Driving is so easy. I don't know why it took me so long to realise this. I was one of those nuts who passed their driving test eons ago and then never really took up driving. I just kept renewing my license every 3 years. The truth was, I was too scared to drive. Plus, there were too many road bullies in KL.

I never drove in KL, until last year when Alex had to come to Melbourne first, leaving his spanking all new Honda Accord behind. So I had little choice but to drive. It was an automatic car, so getting reacquainted with the art of driving came easily.

However, parking was and still is a big problem. I knew I was in for a hard time when I first arrived in Melbourne. Taking another driving test proved to be a nightmare. Subsequently, I had to sit for the practical driving test 5 times before passing. Strangely, it wasn't the parking part of the tests that failed me.

Anyway, I eventually passed. But my parking skills, or rather the lack of it, are horrendous. It doesn't help that Alex seems to have a deep affinity with big cars. I suppose I should be so grateful and lucky to be driving a Mazda CX-7 but it's really huge for me. Worse, the gate of our garage is so narrow that I'm not allowed to drive in and out of the garage. So Alex has to drive the car out in the morning before he leaves for work and then drive it back in when he comes home in the evening.

And parking at Joshua's school is quite a challenge too. So I try to be early when sending him to or picking him up from school. Half the time I can't park straight and have to get out of the car, take a look at the car's position and then re-park. Quite embarrassing.

And the other day, at the car park of the nearby shopping mall, I nearly couldn't get the car into the parking bay. Actually, I almost hit the pillar next to me. Thankfully, 2 good Samaritans came to my aid and directed me. They must be laughing their heads off after that. Most embarrassing.

But last week, I witnessed something near Joshua's school that made me feel better. Another mum who just passed her driving test was doing what I was doing. She got out of the car and re-parked her car. Heh heh. I'm not alone after all.

Magic 100 Words

Joshua has mastered the Magic 100 words, and he's got a certificate to prove it.

I'm referring to the a collection of commonly used words such as "I", "you", "we", 'yes", "no", "can", "red, "like", "some", "as", etc (you get the drift) that Preppies like Joshua are using to learn to read. There were 15 sets of such words and having mastered all the words, Joshua was given an "award" during the school assembly for his effort.

Well, the kids get "awards" for all sorts of things. A bit overdone, I personally think, but good to help boost self-esteem among the kids.

Anyway, what I want to say here is that the approach used by the schools to encourage reading is very effective. The kids have a daily reading kit that they bring home to read everyday. Joshua is picking up his reading skills fairly quickly. He can read signs on the road, notices on the wall, movie posters, etc.

The other day, I tried to avoid telling him about some kid meal that came with a toy at the Red Rooster restaurant but he saw "The Little Red Rooster Meal" on the wall and insisted that I get him that one. So much for trying to hide information from him. He can read now. He can also construct simple sentences, thanks to the weekly diary writing he does at at school.

Yes, young people here read quite well, but they don't count too well. Numeracy somehow isn't given the same focus and emphasis as literacy. Hmm, someone should really look into this. Maybe I'll bring that out when I have my next teacher-parent interview at the school.

The Priest Who Swore

Swearing can be liberating. I do it all the time, sometimes unfortunately in front of the kids. Yeah I know, I ought to be more in control in the presence of the kids. Anyway, we are not talking about my swearing habits here. We are talking about the unusal outburst of a senior Catholic priest here.

Monsignor Geoff Baron, a senior priest in Melbourne, was recently filmed swearing obsenities to a group of young thugs. Worse, the short footage was posted on YouTube and circulated around the Internet. Naturally, such foul behaviour from a spiritual leader caused an uproar within the community. Parents were aghast and the press was unforgiving, demanding that the Church do something about it. The poor man apparently had to go into hiding for a while.

In the midst of all this, people seemed to have forgotten what triggered the abusive outburst in the first place. The abovementioned young punks had been taunting and tormenting the elderly priest as well as damaging church property for years. They had been warned repeatedly not to cause trouble but the warnings were ignored. They boasted about stealing things from parishioners and skated around the church compound in reckless ways.

So finally, on that fateful day, Monsignor Geoff Baron lost his cool and snapped, unfortunately in full view of many people and was caught on film. Well, he shouldn't have done that. But he is human after all and there is only so much shite a man can take. So in a moment of lapse, he did what many people do every hour of their lives. He swore. And he was damned because of that.

Come on. Where is the justice of this? The real baddies here were the young hooligans whom he'd tolerated for eons. If I were in his shoes, I would've throttled each and every one of them years ago! If anyone were to be punished, it has to be those useless punks whose lives obviously have no purpose on this planet. And shame on their parents too for doing such a lousy job bringing them up.

I say if a priest swears, so be it! He must have a good reason for doing so.

Art House Movie Conundrum

As much as I love movies, I am never into art house movies. Never was, never will. They are just too "deep" for me.

Good old Bala used to ask me to check out free art house movie screenings in KL back in our reporter days at The Sun. He meant well, always willing to share what he perceived as great things with his pals (still does), including moi. I tagged along a couple of times, and each time I came out feeling like an idiot!

While everyone else gushed over a particular film, my mind went blank. What the heck was the movie about? I didn't get it. Either I was profoundly stupid or everyone else feigned cleverness. And if someone happened to ask "So what do you think of the show?", I would produce a safe answer - "It was err, interesting," and quickly walked away before he or she asked another question that was even harder to answer.

Here in Melbourne, the video stores are filled with a huge range of art house movies from around the world. For reasons best known to himself, Alex recently picked one called "Irreversible" starring Monica Bellucci from the shelf.

If you've seen it, you'll know how graphic the violent scenes are and how weird it is - it actually starts from the end and keeps going backwards chronologically. I was totally confused and it took me a while to realise the strange sequence. Watching it really drained me. But I must say, each chapter (about 15 minutes) is only one take, with no cuts in between - pretty impressive acting.

Still, impressive or not, art house movies are certainly not my cup of tea. I don't want to tax my brain when I'm watching a movie. I just want to laugh, get some cheap thrills or marvel at beautiful things. Yeah, that's shallow, I know. But that's just me.

Footy Fun Day

Today was one of those fun days at the school. It's Footy Fun Day. All the kids at Joshua's school were encouraged to come in colours of their favourite football team.

Now, that posed a problem. Apparently, Joshua had chosen a team called The Eagles. I had absolutely no clue what The Eagles wear. Miss Ellard, Joshua's teacher, kindly informed me they come in blue and yellow. I neglected to ask what shades of blue. Luckily, I had good old Google to find that out.

So I managed to find the right colours for Joshua today. Well, as expected, he was a little underdressed. The other kids, being real die-hard footy fans or future footy stars, were decked in jerseys, scarves, socks, shoes and hats of their favourite teams! Riots of colours everywhere. They even had time to show off their outfits in the school hall.

Gee, school is so much fun here! I wonder what fun day is next.

Age Of Love

I can't believe I just spent the last hour watching a really dumb show - Mark What's His Name Age Of Love. You know, one of those so-called reality shows in which one guy gets to be intimate with a bevy of hot babes and then eventually chooses one to be his "mate".

Well, this one is kind of "special" because the catch here is someone quite famous - a world-class tennis pro. Can never pronounce or spell this Mark guy's surname but that's not the point here. Anyway, it boggles the mind that someone already rich and famous is subjecting himself to this kind of humiliation and stupidity.

There are 2 groups of women here - the old cows (40-somethings but still look gorgeous thanks to various kinds of enhancements) and the young chicks (well, they look kind of fake too). And as usual, you see claws coming out (Wolverine would've been proud) when there are a group of women vying for the attention of one man . There are backstabbers, conspirators and traitors. I wonder how these people can be in the same room for more than half an hour. All the hatred, jealousy and ill feelings floating in the apartment they share must be very bad for their mental health! Well, that is assuming all this is real and not staged, of course.

But I must say, it was kind of entertaining in a sick and twisted way. I mean, I watched the WHOLE episode. Total waste of time. I have better things to do next week.

No Comparison

The Aussies are generally a nice, friendly and helpful bunch. But they complain a lot too.

They complain about the poor public transport service, about having to pay for this and that, about their councils not doing enough. They are pretty vocal about the country's leadership style too, hitting out at the Prime Minister and other top politicians directly without fear of persecution.

They whinge if the bus is only 5 minutes late. I mean, come on. What's 5 minutes? I've waited for the darn bus for more than 2 hours back in KL before! Five minutes late is actually "on time" according to Malaysian standard. Nay, make that "early".

Taxes are high here for a reason - they go back to the people. Australians enjoy roads without tolls, fantastic public health and community services, top notch civil services and many social benefits unheard of in Malaysia. Yet, it's not enough for some of them. I read about this woman who complained about having to fork out more for petrol these days because the government is not paying her enough family benefits. Duh? She doesn't even have to work and she is whining about not having enough dole?? She ought to go live in Malaysia. She would be out on the street and still be alive if she's lucky!

And what about criticising the Prime Minister and his politicians? Mr John Howard and friends kena left right and centre from everyone here. In Malaysia, if you so much as hint about the PM not doing this or that right, you may get a call from the police very soon. Worse, they may just arrest you under the Internal Security Act and stuff you in some obscure prison indefinitely!

See the difference between First World and Third World? Enough said.

Movie Night

Tuesday. My favourite day. Why? Because of cheap video rentals on Tuesdays. Yep, it's my movie day.

Going to the cinema is an expensive affair here. When we watched Transformers a couple of months back, it cost us a bomb - AU$16 per adult ticket! Renting DVDs is a much cheaper alternative. And there are quite a few options too.

At Video Buster, you can rent a DVD for only AU$1 on Tuesdays and have it for a week. Of course for new releases, the rental period may be limited. Another good place to go is Video EZY. Gosh, they have everything and a lot of new movies. They even sell ex-rental DVDs at crazy prices. Its rental charges are higher than Video Buster's. Still, it's a lot cheaper than going to the cinema.

Renting DVD is really worth it. The kids truly make the best of it, watching their kiddie shows at least 7 times before returning the DVDs!

And another plus - all DVDs are original and uncensored. If you don't like something, don't watch it. The movie rating is clearly printed on the cover. Read carefully before renting.

Well, gotta go. Have to catch my Ocean's Twelve now. I know it's an old movie but I didn't get to see it when it was first released. So it's a treat for me tonight.

Saved By The Ring

I've always known everything happens for a reason. And what happened last night at my parents' house in my hometown in Bukit Mertajam bore testimony to that.

I usually make my weekly phone call to my parents on Sunday evening. And for some reason, I delayed my call for half an hour last night. And that turned out to be a good thing. My 2 sisters were there too and were just leaving when I called. They were already at the gate, getting ready to get in the car. But they went back into the house when they heard that it was me on the phone because they too wanted to have a chat with me.

My youngest sister Wei Wei promptly left her handbag for her husband CP to hold. As he hung around outside the gate, he noticed a motorbike approaching him. As it got nearer the pillion rider stood up, trying to snatch the bag from CP! Good thing he was alert and managed to foil the snatch theft attempt.

I shudder to think if it was Wei Wei standing out there with her handbag. So waif-like, she would have been pushed to the ground and probably got hurt when the 2 goons made their move. Fortunately it was CP, who's bulit like a truck (meant to be a compliment), was standing there instead.

My mother got a little overwhelmed by the incident. Who wouldn't? Our conversation was mostly about the foiled attempt. I couldn't help feeling how fortunate that I am here in Melbourne where such crimes are rare. At the same timeI feel bad for my family in Malaysia who have to face this threat regularly.

I also like to think that I saved the day. But I know deep down my late call happened for a reason. After all, God works his miracles through people and incidents. So this must be one of them.

Seeing Melbourne

I have to admit this. Despite having arrived here eight months ago, I haven't seen much of Melbourne. I go to the same places week after week - Box Hill (for Asian grocery shopping), Knox City (supposedly the largest shopping mall in Australia), Victoria Gardens (because IKEA is there), the city itself, Joshua's school, the local parks and playgrounds and the libraries.

Sad but true. There are so many places in, around and near Melbourne that I haven't set foot on. We've only been to St Kilda Beach once and Crown a couple of times.

So it was quite an experience for us when we ventured a little "further" today. We drove to Docklands. Well, it's very near the city. We just never found the time to go there until today. It's quite a nice setting. Lots of nice yatchs there, buildings shaped like boats and ships as well as a number of fancy restaurants. But it was chilly today and there was a bit of a shower. So we didn't hang around long. Still, it was fun and quite a departure from our normal weekend routine.

I think we should make it a point to go to other "near" places every weekend. Then I will get to see all of Melbourne eventually.

Musicals And Plays

If you love musicals and plays, Melbourne is a good place to live in. There are so many such performances throughout the year.

Now, I have NEVER been to a musical or play, although I did try to catch some at the Istana Budaya in KL a couple of times. Somehow, I never did manage to attend any. I wonder if I would take a liking to them if I did.

Anyway, there are plenty here. Everywhere you go, you can see posters and advertisements announcing plays or musicals by school kids, drama school students or professional actors, singers and musicians.

They start them young here. In schools, music lessons are part of the curiculum. And many kids attend extra music or drama classes after school. And guess what? They are encouraged to perform before an audience, for instance, during the school assembly. I have attended Joshua's school assembly a few times and each time, there will be a couple of students invited to play a musical instrument for everyone in the hall. And they are pretty good. I'm certaint there will be plays and other performances at certain times of the year.

And of course, the pros are at it too. Melbourne being some sort of a centre of performing arts, you'll be able to catch well-known actors and musicians strutting their stuff on stage too. Hugh Jackman was here last year doing his The Boy From OZ tour. Too bad I hadn't arrived here yet. I would have loved to see Wolverine sing and dance on stage. Weird image. But he must have been darn good to earn a Tony Award for his role as Peter Allen in the musical.

Well, maybe next time ...

Fighting Over Nothing

Kids being kids, they often fight over the same toys. Strangely, they must have the same thing. I mean no one would take note of one particular toy until one of them notices it and starts playing with it. Then the other kid, for some inexplicable reason, must have the same thing as well. A tussle will follow, sometimes quite violently too.

That's pretty normal. I had my shares of such fights with my sisters when I was kid too. What is not so common, however, is seeing kids fighting over something that's not even there!

Joshua and Joanne do that a lot and they drive me completely insane whenever they are at it. You see, one of them will pretend to be having an imaginary toy and have a blast playing with it. The other one, curious, would want to know what it is. If the former refuses to tell the latter what it is or share it, the two of them will start shoving each other.

I mean, for crying out loud, it's a PRETEND toy. You can't see, feel or touch it. And yet, the two little devils can fight over it. And they fight, literally. Mike Tyson would have been proud!

Too imaginative, too creative. Maybe I should look at the bright side and hope my kids will put their imagination and creativity to good use someday.

Advance Australia Fair

I've been seriously thinking about applying for an Australian citizenship. Well, all Australian PRs are eligible to apply for it after a 2-year stint here. And since I quite like it here, I might as well go for it once I'm eligible.

So I figure it would be a good idea to start by learning the Australian national anthem. The first time I really heard it sung was at Joshua's first school assembly. Yes, parents are invited to join in the weekly assembly. Cool huh?

Anyway, I attended it a few times and kind of managed to get the anthem's tune in my head. But I still didn't know most of the lyrics. So last week, I did a search on the Australian national anthem and discovered quite a few interesting facts.

I found out that its title is Advance Australian Fair and that it only became the national anthem in 1984. Gee, our Negaraku is even older. You see, the Australians shared the Brits' God Save The Queen before that. That's hardly surprising. The Queen is, after all, still the head of state in Australia.

I also found out that the other contender for the national anthem was Waltzing Matilda. Interesting, no?

My friend Bala insisted that Men At Work's Land Down Under was considered at one point. I chose not to believe him. Waltzing Matilda maybe. But Land Down Under? As cool as it is, I seriously doubt it.

Dried Up

When my Malaysian friends and I talk, we frequently talk about the strange weather in Melbourne - drought, oven hot days, 4 seasons in one day, unexpected cold snaps, winds that howl eerily, etc.

But there's something related that's not that often talked about - the dry air. Malaysians are used to humid conditions. So it's a big change here. Good and bad, of course. Dried food such as biscuits, cereals and crackers stay crisp even after being exposed to the air for long periods of times. And of course, clothes dry super fast, especially in summer. And because we don't sweat as much as we do back in Malaysia, we don't mind taking long walks. These are the plus points.

The downside of having dry air is that you tend to have dry skin too. And that's bad news for people with sensitive skin, like Joanne. So we have to opt for soap-free products and use lots of moisturisers and lip balms. No wonder these products are rather cheap here. There certainly is a big demand for them.

We try our best to apply them religiously. Otherwise, we will sport permanent flaky, itchy skin and cracks on our lips. Not a good feeling I can assure you. Alex got lazy a few days ago and couldn't stop scratcing his back. And now his back looks as though he's been whipped mercilessly. Yeah, awful scratch marks made by himself (Don't get silly ideas. I know some of you have twisted minds). Quite a feat. It must have been ultra itchy!

My hands have been spared much of the dryness-related agony, thanks to my daily routine of moisturising the kids' skin. Now, if I can just remember to moisturise other parts of myself, I will be spared entirely.

Yoyo Flu

Just as the kids were showing signs of recovery from their last bout of cough and flu, they went downhill again!

Last night, Joshua was feverish. After dinner, he perched himself on a chair right next to the heater and claimed that he was cold. He was burning. I gave him some medication and sent him to bed early. Then he coughed non-stop throughout the night. He didn't sleep much. Neither did I.

Today, it's Joanne turn. She is having exactly what Joshua had last night. Both kids are sleeping now as I write this. But I know I'll probably be in for another rough and sleepness night.

Just what kind of bug is floating around? Apparently a lot of other people have fallen sick too. It's probably more common in winter than other seasons. Newbies like us are even more susceptible to winter flu.

Guess Joshua will have to skip school for a couple of days again this week.

The Signs

Driving in Melbourne can be both easy and hard. Let me elaborate.

The demerit system for traffic offences is fully carried out. If pulled over by the traffic policeman, you can't "settle" it by the roadside. No way. Try that and you'll end up in jail. So almost everyone drives within the speed limit, uses signals when turning or changing lanes, gives way to pedestrians and cyclists and best of all, nobody cuts queues here! Road rage is a rarety here.

And the cops mean business. Half the time they are in unmarked cars. So you don't know where they are. So that means you'd better be on your best behaviour while on the road. And therefore, it's easy to go around when everybody obeys the road rules and drives the same way.

Now the hard part. You really, really have to pay attention to the road signs. Trust me, they can be so different. A stretch of road of less than 1km in distance may have varying speed limits - 20km/hr, 30km/hr, 40km/hr, 45km/hr, 50km/hr and 60km/hr. Then you have to watch out for bicycle lanes, merging lanes, parking signs with different information, horses on the road (in the City).

You may also need to share the road with trams. I hate this. The markings confuse me half the time! Then of course, there is the tricky hook turns in the city where you need to temporarily park your car on the left of a junction before you can turn right! That spooks me all the time.

Well, you win some, you lose some. Enough said.

Huggies

"Mummy, give me a hug" - these are the favourite words of one of my kids. Normally, people would assume the request comes from the younger child. But heck no. This is Joshua's (the older child) motto, and he says it every time he sees me. Well, almost.

Sometimes, I don't know whether to be flattered or frustrated. I mean, Joshua is six and yet he is a tad too clingy with me. I detest the term "mummy's boy" but he seems to be turning himself into one. I have no part in it. I want him to be more independent. I don't want to be the mother hen fussing over him all the time.

He is the exact opposite of his younger sister. Joanne is fiercely independent and doesn't give two hoots whether I give her a hug or not. The thing is, after seeing her brother asking for a "huggie", she won't even ask for one. She is pretty cool about this huggie business. Of course, she is so adorable I'll just give her a bear hug anyway.

I suppose I shouldn't be complaining. Children are children for such a short time. Once they hit their teens, they probably don't want to be seen in my company. So maybe I should just shut up and enjoy the huggies sessions while they last.

Are You OK, Mate?

Those were the four words that Alex heard from a kind stranger as he was slumped over the steering wheel of his car, completely inebriated and not able to do much except waving back to indicate he was fine.


That's what happened when you had too much to drink. Alex would later pass out in the car for six hours before waking up and driving home.

That took place in a car park in the city last night. Now, if that had happened somewhere in KL, Alex would have been robbed of all his belongings while he was out and perhaps even thrown out of the car and had his car stolen too.

He was fortunate that Melbournians are much less likely to commit crime than fellows in KL. In fact, many are always ready to give a helping hand, like the stranger who asked Alex if he was okay. This is not to say that it's crime-free here. There are the ocassional break-ins, car thefts, murders and arson attacks.

But the frequency and extent of these crimes are much, much lower than in KL. You don't feel scared walking down the street at night. You need not worry that someone might break into your house if you've properly secured your doors and windows. Your kids are not likely to get snatched and pushed into a passing car while on their way to school.

Of course, you still have to be careful. That is a given. All I can say is that Alex was lucky he didn't pull that stunt while in KL. That would have been disastrous!

Trashy Trivia

Sometimes, I amaze myself with the amount of trash that I know.

Just the other day, I turned on the TV and there were flashes of well-known celebrity faces. And I could name EACH and EVERYONE of them. Nicole, Hugh, Cate, Keanu, Julia, Mischa, Matt, Brad, Uma, Kylie, Heath, Scarlett, Elijah, etc. If there were a test on "Spot The Celeb", I will pass with flying colours, unlike a certain driving test in which I had to sit for FIVE times before passing.

Alex, seated next to me, was impressed. He coulndn't name a single one of the stars. Can't blame him, though. He's into Cantonese movies, not Hollywood fares, although he seems to start developing an appetite for movies from the West. Well, living in Australia does that to you.

Anyway, it isn't just famous faces that I recognise and know. I have a knack of identifying a movie by seeing clips of it even though I've never seen that particular movie before. And when it comes to my favourite stars, what I know is even scarier.

I don't know why my brain is so darn good at absorbing nonsence info like that. But I have a sneaky suspicion I'm not in anyway unique. Millions of others are probably like me. Sad but true - our brains are not being put to good use. Sigh ...

Footy Season

I'll be the first to admit I know next to nothing about Australian Football, or Footy as the locals call it. It looks a bit like rugby and American Football, nothing like the Association Football or Soccer that we Malaysians are more familiar with.

But people do go nuts over Footy here. Football players are big celebrities here. I know none of them except for this fellow called Ben Cousins and all for the wrong reason. He was suspended or something like that for drug abuse and it was a big hoo-haa. The news coverage on him earlier this year made it impossible for me not to notice him. That was months ago. I don't know whether he's playing now in the league.

Personally, I think the game is rather rough. Not very good for Asians with smaller built. If Joshua starts playing Footy, I'm sure he'll end up with bruises all over his already skinny body! Thank goodness he seems more keen on drawing than holding the olive-shaped ball.

But apparently, there has been a slight rift between him and his school buddies who are fans of Footy. During lunch at school, those Ben Cousins wannabes will take to the field and try to emulate their footy heroes. Joshua probably feels a little left out.

Fear not, though. Joshua's teacher says there's no cause for concern. Once Footy Season is over, the boys will be back to their "usual" selves again. Tag will probably be in again.

Road To Recovery

The kids are getting better. The weather is getting warmer too. Hopefully, that means they won't be so susceptible to bouts of cough and cold anymore.

I took them to the clinic 2 days ago. I needn't have bothered. The over-the-counter (OTC)medicines that I'd been giving the kids prior to seeing the doctor turned out to be the right stuff. Well, unlike GPs in Malaysia, their counterparts here don't have the habit of prescribing medicines unnecessarily. Antibiotics prescriptions are unheard of unless the patient is really, really sick. So I can play doctor too, as long as the kids' conditions are not too severe.

The thing is, OTC medicines here are very effective (and hopefully safe for use). It's true. Joshua and Joanne recover much faster here than they did in Malaysia when they fell sick. And I feel much more comfortable knowing they don't have to resort to antibiotics for no good reasons.

Maybe if the Malaysian government forbids doctors from selling medicines, they will stop prescribing medicines, particularly antibiotics, like there's no tomorrow!

Neighbours Bad For English?

Question: Why can't the Brits speak English properly anymore?

Answer: Because they watch too much Neighbours!

Hey, don't laugh. That pretty much sums up a news report entitled Neighbours Blamed For UK Accent Change I read today over National 9 News .

Who would have thought that a soap opera would have such an impact on the British population? The middle and upper classes in Britain are apparently worried about this trend. The younger generation is speaking with a mixture of Australian and British accents.

It doesn't concern me. After all, I don't speak with either accent. While I prefer listening to the "proper" Queen's English (I am, after all, a sucker for Historical Romance novels and constantly "read" the dialogues in Queen's English), I think the Aussie flavour is pretty cool too.

Well, I initially wasn't that big a fan of the Australian accent - not if everyone sounded like the late Steve Irwin. I mean he was a great guy and all that but his thick accent was quite, err, something. But having lived Down Under for the past 8 months or so, the Aussie accent has grown on me. I kind of like it now - as long as it's not too thick!

Well, Joshua is already speaking with an Australian accent. Joanne is sure to follow suit when she starts Prep next year. So yeah, Australian accent is cool to me. So what's the big deal about speaking English Neighbours-style?

Choked

Today, I nearly choked to death. Well, maybe not to death but it was quite scary.

I was in a hurry to pop my flu capsules - thanks to the kids I've caught the flu bug too - and didn't pay attention to the small piece of foil stuck to one of the capsules. You know, it's one of those things where you break the foil to pop the capsule out.

Anyway, I took 2 capsules, popped them in my mouth and washed them down my throat with water in one single gulp. And immediately, I felt something nasty lodged in my throat! I gulped down more water but the thing was still stuck. It was the most uncomfortable feeling.

I tried to cough that darn thing out but it wouldn't budge. And I could feel something beginning to block something in my throat. What if my windpipe was blocked?? Would I pass out and the kids wouldn't even notice?? I started to panic.

I rushed to the toilet and forced myself to throw up. What if I couldn't get it out? A vision of me being rushed to the hospital flashed before me. Then it struck me - if I passed out first no one would know my predicament. The kids were oblivious to what was happening to me. And they didn't know how to call for help.

After retching for a few seconds, the miserable piece of foil dropped into the toilet bowl with the name of the brand still on it! It was about the size of a thumbnail. Instant relief.

After that, I told Joshua I almost choked. He just nonchalantly said, "why?"

I don't want a repeat of the incident. So I'll make sure I look carefully before swallowing anything. Also, I taught Joshua how to make an emergency call. Just get the phone and press 000 and press "talk". Of course, I made him memorise the house address too. You never know when you need that kind of help.

Knocked Out

Both kids are knocked out, again. Well, it's winter after all. And now that Joshua is back at school, he is once more exposed to the elements that will have him sneezing, coughing and complaining of a stuffy nose and sorethroat. Many kids in school have the same symptoms.

He was sick before the winter holidays. He recovered last week only to have a new bout of cough and cold today. This time, it comes with a slight fever and worse, he's sharing the discomfort with Joanne now.

Cross-infection. I hate this term. It spells trouble, sleeplessness and frustration for me. If both of them recover at the same time, that's fine. But if one recovers first while the other is still in the throes of attempting to ward off the cold bugs, there is a big chance the former will catch it again from the latter. And this can go back and forth for some time!

I hope both Joshua and Joanne get well soon. Otherwise, I'm going to fall sick myself!

Harry Potter Mania

For a book and movie reader, I probably have committed the deadliest sin - I have NEVER read a single Harry Potter book, nor have I ever watched a single Harry Potter movie from the beginning till the end. I've seen bits and pieces of some of the movies but those don't count.

Shocking huh? What kind of book and movie lover is this? I mean I love Tolkien's Lord of the Rings books and Peter Jackson's blockbuster movies of the same titles. But somehow, I never came around to reading Rowling's offerings.

Why? I don't know. I just never did.

And I don't quite understand how Harry Potter has become such a global hit. I mean, there is so much hoo-hah over the leak of the last installment - Harry Potter and The Deathly Hallows. And gosh, people lined up early in the morning at bookshops across the world to buy the book on the day it was released in the market. Wow, these must be real die hard fans.

And Rowling must be laughing all the way to the bank - whether Harry Potter dies or not!

Proudly Australian

Back in Malaysia, we have this "Beli Barangan Buatan Malaysia" campaign. Buy local, support local goods. Apparently, there is a similar thing in Australia. You'll see the label "Proudly Australian" in many locally produced and manufactured goods.

It's hardly surprising since the market here too has been inundated with goods "Made In China". The funny thing is, even the "Made In China" products here are better than those seen in Malaysia.

Anyway, it's not just locally grown and manufactured goods that are the pride of Australians. They have another kind of goods and exports that they are immensely proud of - movie exports.

Yep, just look at Nicole Kidman. She is BIG here. I had no idea until I got here. You can find pictures and news bits about her in EVERY issue of the tabloid magazines here. Every move she makes, every statement she issues, every man she is seen with, etc, are all documented meticulously. Good thing she doesn't live in Australia. She would've been hounded by the paparazzi all year round. Wait, maybe that's why she doesn't live here.

And of course, there is the multi-talented Hugh Jackman too. I never thought much of him until I saw Kate & Leopold, in which he played a poor nobleman from 1876 transported to the 20th century. The movie sank but Jackman as Leopold truly shone. Leopold and Wolverine were as similar as black and white. That was when I realised this guy CAN actually act. And to my utter surprise, I later found out he actually had a stage and musical background. Wolverine in musicals?? Yeah, his range is that amazing. Needless to say, I'm a big - and perhaps a bit obsessed fan - now. Yeah, my desktop wallpaper features Leopold. Gorgeous. Ha ha.

And there are others too - Cate Blanchett, Russel Crowe, Naomi Watts, Heath Ledger, Julian McMahon, etc. And I just read that many Australian TV actors are also in the running for various awards in the Emmys.

Watch out Hollywood. Aussiewood will rule someday!

Nasi Lemak, Anyone?

Food and I - we go hand in hand. I go nuts when the buffet table is covered with an assortment of food. Trust me, I'll be one of those who makes at least 5 trips to the buffet table. And each trip features me with a HUGE pile of food on my plate and an equally HUGE grin on my face.

But strangely, I'm not all that fussy about food. Sure, if the food looks and tastes great, it's a plus. Still, if it's not, I don't hang myself over it. Which is fine because where I am now, I'm also the chef of the household and I'm not known for my culinary skills. So no gourmet stuff, just ordinary meals that get the family going.

And I didn't seem to miss any of the Malaysian hawker stuff like nasi lemak, mee goreng, char koay teow, asam laksa, roti canai, rojak buah, pasembor, etc, until 2 friends brought them up in separate ocassions.

During one of our recent chats, Nani, my partner in crime since our reporter days back at The Sun, talked about the nasi campur with the spicy crab and prawns that we used to gobble down during our lunch break. I hadn't thought about that for nearly 2 years until she brought the subject up. And that night, I had the strangest dream - me and Nani on a weird mission to find our favourite rice stall and no matter what we did, we just couldn't find it. Gosh, what a sick dream.

Then Sangeeta, another ex-colleague who has also migrated to Melbourne, tempted me with talks of how she got some nice nasi lemak bungkus not far from her house. I begged her to give me the address. Alas, I haven't checked the place out yet.

Well, Malaysian food isn't all that hard to find here. But more often than not, it tastes a bit weird, even though the chef is really Malaysian. You can even find nasi lemak in some of the Asian grocery shops but I have yet to be tempted to give it a try. The look of it is enough to make me cringe. Maybe I should learn to make my own nasi lemak. The roti canai sold in the grocery shops, however, isn't too bad.

All this talk about food is making me hungry. Thank goodness I still have lots of potato chips in the house ...

Posh In LA

Let's get one thing straight first. I am NOT a big fan of the Beckhams but I've gotta say this - they, especially the pouty half of the duo, sure know how to make a spectacle of themselves. So when the new reality TV show starring Mrs Beckham herself made its debut last night over Channel 9, I just had to catch it.

For the uninitiated, I'm referring to Victoria Beckham: Coming To America. The first episode showed how the former Posh Spice first arrived in LA ahead of her family "to find a house, a school and a manicurist"!

Boy, it was a circus! Honestly, it was so hilarious I don't think any of it was real. Half of it was probably staged. Still it had me in stitches in no time! And Victoria wasn't all that bad. I mean, she at least had the grace to poke fun at herself. Of course, she poked fun at others too. If you haven't seen it, you should check out the part where she accepted an invitiation by some ageing LA socialites to a tea party. Gosh, those women were so scary that Victoria actually looked normal!

And naturally, everywhere she went, she was trailed by the paparazzi. At one point, she dropped in a sex shop and got a blow-up doll, dressed it up as Posh and used it as a decoy for the circus to follow.

Oh, another part I found hilarious was during an earthquake demo provided by a so-called earthquake specialist (California is prone to such natural catastrophe after all). As instructed, she ducked under the table with her butt sticking out. She was wearing something really short and she promptly shouted , "Can you see my knickers??!"

And guess who she brought along on her trip? Her hairstylist and her make-up artist! Over-indulgent? Most definitely but if you have that kind of money to blow it, why the heck not?

Hail, Hail!

Okay, I take back what I said yesterday about the winter in Melbourne. After babbling about snow never making an appearance in Melbourne, it actually SNOWED in some parts of Melbourne this morning! And apparently, today was the coldest in Melbourne in nine years!

No, I personally didn't experience any snow in my area but I did have another kind of icy encounter - hail. What really boggled the mind was the speed at which it took place.

The weatherman did say something about hail early today but as I was leaving the house at around 3pm to pick Joshua up from school, I took a good look at the sky. Bright and sunny. It didn't look like it was going to rain at all. Then, as I arrived at Joshua's school about 8 minutes later, I noticed the sky had turned very dark. Strange. Then it started to drizzle as Joanne and I walked towards the school compound. Then it got really, really windy. We nearly lost our umbrella.

As we took shelter under the roofed verandah, the wind started to howl. Then some really scratchy sound surrounded us. Some of the mums waiting there squealed and started to get excited about something. I looked up and saw, for the very first time in my life, tiny hailstones! And they just dropped from the sky!

They were like little pebbles and started melting almost the minute they hit the ground. Of course, the temperature dipped at that point. I felt as if I was sitting in a freezer. Both Joanne watched the hailstones in awe! Apparently, the locals were in awe too. I guess hail isn't all that common.

Unbelievable. The weather changed so drastically in less than half an hour. I'd never experienced anything like that. It's true when they say Melbourne is a city with four seasons in a day!

Winter Time, Victorian Style

Most Malaysians identify winter with snow and icy weather. Well, in many European and North American countries, that's how winter is .

But not here in Victoria. Yes, it's still freezing cold, especially at night and early in the morning but the temperature hardly ever drops below zero degree. My cousin told me there were a few times when the temperature did dip that low but that happened 20 or 30 years ago.

Of course, there is snow in the mountains but you actually have to travel there to experience snow. So that doesn't really count.

Back to my first winter experience in Melbourne - I don't mind the cold all that much. It FEELS like winter but minus the hazards that come with snow. I can't imagine driving when it's snowing! My driving skills are not that up to mark and it's better to drive in more familiar conditions. Even the foggy windscreen in the morning is already proving to be a challenge to me. I shudder to think if I have to drive on slippery roads covered with snow! I'll probably end up doing time at the Box Hill hospital with broken limbs.

One more thing - a sunny day in winter maybe sunny but it can also be freezing at the same time. I mean, it looks awfully warm outside if you're looking out from the inside of your house but once you step outside, you feel as if you've stepped into a freezer!

No wonder I see people in the movies wearing such thick clothing with the sun shining brightly above them and they don't get sweaty at all. Back in Malaysia, you would've had a heat stroke dressed like that!

Having experienced much cooler temperatures here, I don't know if I can ever get used to the hot and humid weather back in Malaysia again.

Do It Yourself

If there is one thing that one must absolutely have in a household in Australia, it is the toolbox - with all the tools intact.

You see, we have to assemble furniture IKEA-style. Yep, unless you don't mind forking up lots of money getting someone to set up your furniture (labour is pricey here), you'd better learn to be handy with tools.

I'm lucky. Alex, being an engineer, is pretty good at reading manual instructions and putting the pieces together. If I were on my own here, I probably won't have any furniture in my house! Either that or I'll have to make sure I get so filthy rich that I can afford people to assemble my furniture for me.

The same goes with chunky electrical items. You know how confusing it can be when you see all those cables and wires with different colours and you just don't know what goes where? Yep, you have to figure all that out yourself too. The guys from the electrical shop will just drop your Plasma TV, fridge, washing machine, etc and then make their exit. They don't hang around plugging in the wires for you.

Well, Australia is a great country. But sometimes, certain things are still better in Malaysia. At least you don't have to worry about fixing the wrong leg onto your brand new chair. Guess you can't have it all!

Sticky Business

Kids love stickers. I don't know why. I loved them too when I was a kid. But back then, there weren't that many choices.

Fast forward 20 or 30 years later, you find a wide range of stickers to suit all ages and tastes. Just walk into any supermarket, stationery or book shop. They are everywhere, enticing kids to go nearer (and eventually bug their parents until the latter relent and buy them some).

Popular cartoon and superheroes characters are the bestsellers, naturally. I've had Spider-Man, Superman, Batman, Ultraman, Pokemon, Hello Kitty, Barbie and the latest craze Transformers stuck on the furniture in the kids' playroom. Thankfully, Joshua and Joanne know that the walls are off limits.

I don't know if the teachers in Malaysia practise this but the teachers in Melbourne actually use stickers as rewards to kids who have done something well in school. Well, there are "official" stickers too! Joshua is a goody two shoe at school - hence the increasing number of stickers in his collection (he doesn't throw the stickers away, he peels them off his jacket or shirt and stick them on his toy box!).

Stickers are great fun, I suppose. I use them too to reward the kids when they behave. And they certainly are way cheaper than toys.

Excuse Me, Sir?

"Excuse me!" A woman in her 40s shouted after an elderly gentleman about to return his shopping trolly after putting his groceries in his car boot.

"Excuse me!" She tried again, louder, and the man turned around.

"Would you like me to return the trolly for you?" she offered.

"Why yes," the old man replied, delighted that he didn't have to walk all the way back to the other end of the car park.

I see scenes like this all the time here. It's amazing how strangers will step out and offer their help to you. My family and I've enjoyed this previlige too from time to time. And they are especially nice to women with kids and the elderly.

They hold doors for you; they give way to you; they immediately pick up things that you or your kids drop; they tell you where an available parking bay is; etc. The bus drivers here are excellent. They listen to you patiently as you ask them about directions or places you want to go. I boarded enough buses in KL to know that bus drivers there don't give two hoots about their passengers.

All this talk about Malaysians being friendly, helpful, caring and hospitable is just what it is - talk, no action. Oh sure, they exercise all that when approached by Western foreigners but somehow don't think about extending the same treatment to their fellow countrymen.

The situation is the other way round here. Melbournians (I haven't been to other cities so I'm not quite sure how the folks there behave) are generally helpful and friendly to others - regardless of their origins, backgrounds and colours.

Public servants here smile at you and listen to you tentatively. Back where I came from, all you see are surly faces, old stares and appalling standard of work at government departments.

So it's not surprising I don't miss home all that much, except for my parents and my sisters.

Heroes Vs X-Men

The only TV series that I'd been watching - Heroes - finished its first season last Wednesday. Cool show, I quite like it, and I especially like Hiro (played by Masi Oka). He's cute, no? And quite likely the soul of the series.

I don't know about others but I can't help comparing these Heroes with the mutant X-Men. Heroes, of course, seem more earthly - at least they look more human although they come with various superpowers that rival those of the X-Men.

Claire for instance, can regenerate tissue immediately whenever she gets hurt. So can Wolverine (though they look nothing alike!). Too bad she doesn't have claws.

Parkman can read other people's thoughts. Pretty much like Prof Xavier and Jean Grey. Too bad he can't fling people around with his thoughts.

Peter Petrelli can absorp other Heroes' abilities. Rogue has something similar since she too can temporarily absorp the powers of others through direct skin contact. Luckily Peter doesn't suck the life out of others.

Nikki/Jessica has superhuman strength. So do quite a number of X-Men. Too bad she has a spilt personality.

DL can walk through walls. This ability has been seen in the X-Men movies. There's also a character that morphs in Heroes, like Mystique does.

Heroes and X-Men. They both rock. But one shudders to think if either is real!

Mad About Pets

The Aussies love their pets, I mean they REALLY love their pets. You see them walking their dogs everywhere. About a quarter of the mums who pick up their kids from Joshua's school bring their dogs along. Dogs seated happily in moving vehicles and lazing under the tables of sidewalk cafes are also a common sight here.

Even shops and restaurant operators are "dog-friendly". They don't normally allow dogs in their premises but they do provide bowls of water and something that allow the owners to tie the dogs' leashes to outside the shops while their owners pop in the shops.

It's not an exaggeration to say that some of the pet owners treat their pets as if they are biologically born to them. No kidding. I know many Malaysians love their pets too but I daresay their affection is nowhere close to what I've seen here.

I've seen people carrying their pets across the street lest they get hit by other moving vehicles; I've heard about people taking sick leave when their pets are sick; I've visited pet shops with a WIDE range of stuff for pets that I'd never seen back in KL; and of course, I know these people sleep with their pets.

I had pets too. I personally love cats. But you'll never catch me calling my boss saying that I can't come to work because my cat has been puking all day. I'll probably be fired from my job.

Snipped

Joanne has done it again! She snipped off some of her hair while I wasn't looking.

Well, at least it wasn't as bad as the previous time. In fact, I didn't notice it until just before I tucked her in. I should've known better. I saw her pretending to be cutting her toys' "hair" earlier but didn't bother taking a closer look since these toys were soft toys with no hair.

If she'd been playing with her "Barbies" (some are wannabe Barbies), I would have checked on her. After all, some of her dolls had gone almsot bald, no thanks to her propensity for being creative with their hair. "Because I don't like it," she would tell me when caught in the act.

Well, what's done is done. Maybe Joanne aspires to be a hairstylist. I don't mind. Hairstylists make big bucks here after all. I just have to make sure she doesn't get too carried away with trimming her own hair!

The Stool

I'm not referring to the thing you sit on. It's the other thing - the one you see in toilets.

Okay, if you have a weak stomach, stop reading. I just have to put this down in words so that my son can read this some day!

You see, taking a urine sample is one thing. Taking a stool sample is quite another. Joshua has been having some tummy problem for a few weeks. And last week, after a visit to the doctor, I was told to get his stool sample so that the lab could run some tests to see what exactly was wrong with him.

Today was the day. How does one collect a stool sample? A bit tricky, that's for sure. Here's the step-by-step thing to do as I recalled.

Step 1: Put a disposable plastic container inside the toilet bowl.
Step 2: Get the kid to do his business the usual way on the toilet seat.
Step 3: Wait for kid to complete task. Clean up kid.
Step 4: Look into the toilet (This is where the scary part starts!).
Step 5: Look more closely into the toilet (at which point the stool seems to be staring silently back at you. I swear it!) to find the best way to collect the stool sample.
Step 6: Use something (in my case a pair of disposable chopsticks) to scoop up some stool. Tip - Hold your breath while doing this.
Step 7: Gently pick up the stool and put in in the jar the clinic provided. Aim for the opening so that you don't make a big, smelly mess! Tip - Keep holding your breath.
Step 8: Seal the jar. Make sure there are no remnants of stool anywhere around it.

Yucky? You bet. I hope I don't EVER have to do this again. The images of the stool as it sat quietly in the plastic container, as I scooped some of it up, as I transferred it into the jar and as I sealed it have been etched on my memory for good.

Alex will never be able to do this. Neither would his mother, who claimed to love her first grandchild unconditionally!

Comic Relief

It blows my mind away to see grown men being so addicted to comics. I mean, IT is a global phenomenon. IT is big business. Just look at the movies based on comic books that have sprouted out of Hollywood. Many have become blockbusters and gave birth to new movie stars.

I can easily name 10 movies on top of my head right now - Superman, Spider-Man, Batman, X-Men, the Fantastic Four, Dare Devil, The Phantom, Ghost Rider, Judge Dread and The Incredible Hulk. Half of these come with sequels. Granted, not all are hits. There are quite a few misses too.

But the fact is, comics are BIG. My husband is one of those who get withdrawal syndromes if he misses his weekly dose of comic books. Well, he's not into the products of Marvel and DC but he's fixated with Chinese comics. You know, those with swashbuckling heroes who can fly around ala Crouching Tiger, Sleeping Dragon style? Yeah, he's so into it. So is his best friend.

And they swap comics to save money without fail every week - and these are grown men in their 40s, one of whom is very successful in his career (not my husband, his friend, sigh ...)

Alex can miss a lot of things on weekends. He can miss his movies, TV, meals, taking the kids out but he NEVER misses his comics (which he gets on Sundays). If this is not obsession, I don't know what to call it!

Then again, I'm sure millions of other grown men around the world out there can understand this obsession.

Go Green

Australians are generally greener than Malaysians. People really do take the initiative not to waste anything that can be re-used and recycled.

Here are some examples. Supermarkets don't usually give you a plastic bag for the goods you buy unless you have more than 5 items. And you see "green" shopping bags everywhere. Well, they don't necessarily come in green all the time but almost every shop worth being called a shop sells these "green bags" for you to put the stuff you've bought so that you don't keep using plastic bags. And of course, you're constantly reminded to bring your "green bags" whenever you go shopping.

And if you've seen the various types of garbage bins along the streets, you'll know recycling is serious business here. Trash is picked up once a week and you have to separate your rubbish into 3 varieties - recyclables(paper, plastic, glass, tin cans, etc), garden wastes and general rubbish.

Also, water is premium stuff here. So everyone is encouraged to save water in any way they can. Of course, water restrictions of varying stages are often in place to ensure water isn't wasted. You can even exchange your current shower head for a water-saving one from the water authorities for free! And last week, I saw this lady making it her personal mission to tell everyone she ran into at the supermarket about the freebie.

You don't see these things in Malaysia. Malaysians sure can learn a thing or two from the Aussies about going green.

Time Flies

Is it just me or time is really slipping through us more quickly than, say 10 years ago?

We've been in Melbourne for more than 7 months but it seems like just yesterday. Where has the time gone? I haven't done much. My daily routine is a pretty much the same - wake up, feed kids breakfast, send Joshua to school with Joanne tagging along (even when we had to catch the public bus), come back home to do house chores and prepare meals, eat lunch, get Joanne to take a quick nap, then go out to pick up Joshua from school, come home, bathe the kids, prepare dinner and do more house chores, have dinner and sleep.

Boring. But when you do the same thing everyday, time passes even faster. And the fact that there are 4 seasons here makes it seem even faster. You see, every 3 months, you have to re-organise your wardrobe. Three months are a short time. Before you know it, you have to put your current clothes aside to make way for more weather appropriate clothes.

Back in Malaysia, we didn't feel that because we wore the same kind of clothers throughout the entire year!

It's scary to think that time waits for no one. I can remember my mother very vividly when she was my age or even younger. It won't be long when Joanne says the same thing!

Half my life is gone - very likely more than half! Hopefully, God is kind enough to give me some time to do more than just routine housework before my time on Earth runs out! A trip around the world will be nice ...

We're Game!

The kids have been restless - we are in the midst of the winter school holidays now and they are both home all the time. Which means I need to find ways to keep them amused.

They've been glued to the idiot box too often and are going to damage the Flushed Away DVD that I borrowed from my friend soon if I don't stop them from playing it repeatedly.

I needed something else to keep them amused. Colouring books have worn out their novelty. So those were out. What else could "babysit" them while I slog away trying to keep the house clean and whip out meals?

The computer, of course, or more accurately, online games. But first, I had to find the easy and free ones for kids Joshua and Joanne's age. After a few click over Google, I found something useful - www.uptoten.com.

Here, you can find hundreds of games. We've just explored a few and the kids loved them! Well, I still had to explain a few things to them but once they got the hang of it, I could actually leave them alone for a short while. And it's a good thing we have 2 laptops. So no fighting took place.

I just hope I hadn't got them too hooked on online games!

Hospital Blues

Okay, this is l-o-n-g overdue but I feel the need to put in an entry here. Our last new year's eve was really memorable, all for the wrong reason.

A few days before the last day of 2006, Joanne developed some blisters and itchiness on her feet. Thinking that it was just a case of "normal" rash, I applied some cream on the affected areas. But things got worse. And it got really, really bad on the evening of December 31, 2006. Joanne couldn't stop crying. She's one tough cookie. She wouldn't cry unless she was in real pain and discomfort.

I panicked though Alex didn't seem at all concerned, which infuriated me more. We had just arrived in this new country and had really no idea how to go about such a medical emergency on the eve of a public holiday.

Luckily, my cousin gave me some idea. She told me to go straight to the Emergency Department of the Box Hill Hospital. It would be quite a wait, she warned, but it certainly was better than having Joanne howling through the night.

I was sceptical but had no other better options. The hospital is just five minutes away from our house in Doncaster. We got there and the nurse in charged promptly attended to this little girl with "swollen and itchy feet". I was surprised. The people working there were so helpful and cheerful on a night when they should've been out partying with friends and family.

Yes, it was a long wait and Joanne was seen by several doctors. In the end, she had to be admitted for observation. The medication given didn't seem to work on her and she cried all night long. But at least I knew we could get help quickly if we needed to. It was a long night. By the next day, the swelling had reduced slightly. The paediatrician who saw Joanne decided to keep her there for another day.

And since it was holiday season, most kids were away. There was only another baby in the next room. And we got first class treatment from the staff there. There was a nice playrooom (see pix) and Joanne felt so happy there she forgot her discomfort.

Joshua and Alex came to visit. And Joshua too got excited about the toys and videos he got to "share" with Joanne (and no one else since there were no other patients).

In the end, we stayed there 2 nights. The problem - contact dematitis. Joanne's sensitive skin might have come into contact with something that irritated her skin dramatically.

The doctors and nurses were great. That was the first good impression we had of Melbourne. Fantastic public service. No such thing when I came from!

Joanne is fine now, though she's a big user of moisturiser to keep her dry and sensitive skin moisturised. Well, that's better than being a regular at the hospital!

Field Day For Kids

It didn't seem like a promising start. You see, Joshua has been having this tummy problem as well as a runny nose and cough for a couple of weeks. So I figured it's best I took him to the doctor.

After a quick breakfast, I got the kids into the car and drove to the clinic. The sky was gloomy - kind of matched our mood. Thankfully, the wait at the clinic was a short one. Nothing seriously wrong with Joshua. Probably some mild viral infection that came with the cold. It should clear within a week. Hopefully.

Then we went to Box Hill Centro. Ah, that's where the first glimpse of brightness emerged. First the kids got nice big fat balloons and lollies from some girls promoting a contest. Next, we stumbled on the Snakebusters - some event featuring really cool reptiles. Joanne even patted a couple of them. Too bad we didn't have our camera with us. And my mobile phone is a museum piece without a camera.

But it was okay. Things were already brightening. Then I took the kids to get some stickers (I promised them they would get stickers if they went to the clinic without any violent protests). There were some cool ones but then we hit a mini jackpot - a box filled with an assortment of stickers for only $2! Of course we took that.

The kids were happy now. What a great morning it turned out to be after all. After a Happy Meal at McDonalds, at which the kids got a free toy each, we headed home.

More great surprises await us. Joshua found lots of mail in our mailbox, two of which were addressed to him - one from his ex-classmate Wong Yi Qing and another from his Sam Yee and Uncle Rizal (my sister and brother-in-law). Joshua loves receiving letters. Imagine his utter joy to receive not one but 2 letters. Yi Qing had made a nice picture while my sister and her husband had sent him a birthday card with Transformers bookmarks and a very nice sticker!

Overjoyed and over the mooon. That's how I'd describe Joshua. Joanne was happy too. She got a Bumblebee bookmark.

Well, since everything went so well for the kids, I made them promise me not to misbehave today. So far so good. Of course I still have a couple of hours till they hit the sack. And until then, anything can happen!

Disconnected Again!

Just my luck. I lost my Internet connection again yesterday. For the entire day, I felt as if one of my limbs had gone on holiday. It just didn't feel right not being able to click on something on the computer that could link me to the outside world.

Also, my kids had been bugging me to go online to search for Transformers-related stuff! They just wanted to see some cool images of the Autobots and Decepticons in actions.

Anyway, I tried every other hour. Nothing worked. I called Alex at the office and asked if he forgot to pay the broadband bill. He said he'd paid and that he'd take a look at the computer and the connection when he came back. Well, it was going to be a long wait since he had a dinner meeting last night.

So we couldn't surf the net. Joshua was disappointed. Luckily there were still lots of DVDs, including the much-loved Flushed Away, to keep the kids occupied.

After the kids went to bed at eight, I decided to kill time by watching something on the TV. There was a concert for the Princess Diana. Not bad. I actually saw a few veterans strut their stuff on stage - Sir Tom Jones was still groovy, Rod Steward wasn't that impressive and Jason Donovan looked so old!

Alex came back at 11pm. And guess what he did to rectify my problem? Just unplugged the main switch for a couple of seconds and plugged it back on. Voila! We were connected again. So simple.

He should've told me to do that. That would've saved me a lot of restlessness!

My Little Monsters

Some of my friends have asked for pictures of my kids. Well, here is a shot of them. Kids being kids, they are cute when they behave well and are obedient. But half the time, the monsters in them will take over. That's when they drive me up the wall.

I feel bad sometimes because I've resorted to threats and blackmails when they do not behave. I'll probably be arrested for having some of the evil thoughts that emerge in my head.

Okay, I'll try not to be so mean. It's a good thing they still love and adore me, though I can be a real monster myself sometimes!

I guess there are not two, but three, monsters sometimes.

Is It Starting Soon?

"Is the show going to start soon?", Joshua asked the 13th time, keeping his tone down in the packed cinema.

"Soon. It will start soon," I whispered back to him, though I was beginning to wonder myself if the much anticipated Transformers was ever going to swing into action anytime in the near future.

I lost count of the trailers and advertisements that we in the audience had to endure. Granted, some of the trailers were really cool. The new Harry Potter movie and another fantasy kind of offering called Stardust were particularly impressive. But the advertisements were a bit too much. After all, we'd seen most of them on the television.

The kids started to get a little restless. They'd waited all week for this. Too bad. Being forced to watch trailers and advertisements is part of cinema-going after all. There was nothing I could do about it.

Then, more than half an hour after we'd stepped into the cinema hall, Transformers finally hit the big screen.

Well, what can I say? It was worth the wait. The mean machines looked so real when they transformed. It's amazing what special effects and CGIs can do these days. It was nothing like the cartoon version that I saw before!

Joshua was thrilled. He forgot about the long wait earlier. Joanne, on the other hand, fell asleep halfway but managed to wake up just in time to catch the last half hour, which was loaded with real heavy duty, Matrix-style whacking and kicking and slicing between the Autobots and the Decepticons.

Well, I just hope I don't have to wait another half an hour in my next visit to a cinema. Such a waste of time. I could've done so much in half an hour.