Friends Of My Own

I never realised how much I missed the company of friends until I made some of my own friends earlier this year. The first year we were here, I hardly ventured out of the home, safe the few trips to buy groceries and the weekend outings with the whole family.

The thing is, I didn't feel anything lacking. Perhaps I was too busy getting the kids (including the XL size one) and household organised. After I dropped Joshua off at school, I often went home with Joanne in tow. We didn't send her to kindergarten so I had to take care of at all times. Which meant no free time for myself.

Then Joanne started school earlier this year. I suddenly found myself with a lot of free time. Hooray! Freedom at last. But that doesn't mean I get to lepak all day long. There is still a lot of housework to attend to - it's never-ending but at least I didn't have to tag along a small kid wherever I go anymore. And that makes things a much, much easier.

At school, I got to know a few more mums. I got particularly close to two of them - fellow Malaysians. Sze Nam and her family moved here almost a year after mine. So she was even newer to the environment than I was. The strange thing is that she lived in a neighbourhood not far from mine back in Cheras. And we had to travel all the way to Melbourne to meet each other. I might have seen her in Malaysia before. She worked as a pharmacist at Guardian and I used to haunt Guardian a lot! I thought she looked really familiar when we first met.

Lina, on the other hand, has lived in Melbourne for nearly 20 years, since her university days. So she knows a fair bit about a lot of things here. Plus, she is a certified accountant - really useful to have her as a friend! Lina and I also share another special bond. Both our daughters are named Joanane. More we both seem to have the same taste in clothers, having several identical outfit!

So these days, after I drop the kids at school, I would hang around at either Lina or Sze Nam's house. They both have a 2-year-old son each, so I help them a bit whenever I can. Lina's son, Arthur, for some inexplicable reasons, adores me. So I could watch him while Lina tries to organise her household. Sze Nam's son, Ken Zet, however, doesn't share that affinity. So the only way I can help is to go food shopping with her from time to time.

Well, it's so good to have my own friends - not that my cousin and Alex's friend's wife Anla had not been helpful. They have, especially when I first got here. But it sure is nice to have a few more good pals.

Play Time

It's been a good week for Joshua. He's been to his best friend, Alexander's house twice after school just to play. The first time was on Wednesday and yes, that was his very first outing to a friend's (his own friend, I mean, not kids of his father's friends) house.

He was having so much fun performing Pokemon battles with his pal that he didn't want to come home with me when I went to pick him up 2 hours later. I didn't want to impose on Alexander's mum, Rosemary. So I insisted that he gather his things and leave.

But Rosemary kindly offered to let them play for a few more minutes. So while we waited for the kids to stop playing, we had a nice chat between us. To be honest, I haven't exactly been a social butterfly since arriving here. It's usually hi and bye for me whenever I see the other mums at Joshua's school. But Joshua's hanging out with Alexander after school at the latter's house had given me the chance to at least get to know another parent better.

I found out that Rosemary actually lived in Butterworth as a child. Her father was with the Royal Australian Air Force and was posted at their base there more than 30 years ago. Interesting. She also loves cats (she has 2 of them) - something in common with me.

But the best thing is - she has asked me to bring Joanne along (which is what I did today) to play with the boys. I was hesitant at first because I didn't think it would be nice to make her "babysit" my kids for 2 hours. After all, I didn't know her that well. Still she insisted, saying that it was actually quite alright because the kids don't usually bother her when they are that preoccupied with their own games. Which is quite true. I can relate to that too because whenever my nephew Andrew comes for a visit, I actually manage to finish more work! So I left my 2 kids in her care for 2 hours today.

What bliss! Ha ha. Maybe I should socialise more with the other mums too. Play time after school for the kids turns out to be a great thing for both the kids and me.

The Reunion

Over the weekend, we met up with some old friends who had come for a visit in Melbourne. Our little get-together was held at another friend’s house in Balwyn North since only his fortress-like abode can fit all 30 of us!

It was so good to see some old familiar faces and to catch up with one another. And since each family had its own little army of little people, the house was filled with screaming and running kids as well.

A few years ago, such a reunion of friends would see us chatting, drinking, smoking, eating, drinking, reminiscing, drinking, playing cards, smoking, drinking – you get my drift. Later, we’d probably go somewhere else only to indulge in the same things. And this could go on till the wee hours of the next day.

But these days, we don’t all get to sit down together. Some of us, usually the mums, will have to attend to the kids first, making sure they eat their dinner and are not fighting among themselves before having the chance to sit down and enjoy the meal and conversation. And when we all finally sit down to play catch up, some of the kids will barge in and demand some attention. Quite a struggle holding up a conversation when you have cranky kids pulling at your clothes and hair!

Naturally, we all become like Cinderella. By midnight, it’s time to hit the road and go back to where we’ve crawled out from earlier. The night is still young but our priorities have shifted to the young ones. So we reluctantly bid each other goodnight.

That’s what happened that evening. There was so much to catch up on but so little time and too many distractions. Still, the “party” was a blast. Wish we could have a few more of that every now and then!